Well, Sister is still on her quest to find a suitable mate in the world of online dating. She's not having much luck but she refuses to give up just yet. She's having too much fun with her advice line on What Not To Put In Your Profile!
From the Family Files presents... Online Dating Faux Pas by Shayla's Sister.
1) Don't have a picture of you licking a cat on your profile. Gee, gonna need the secret decoder ring to crack that code, Skippy.
2) Don't list that you are 72 years old and under 'children' you checked the box for 'yes, living at home with me.' Why, so they can change your... depends, Pappy? Stop winking at me.
3) Don't say you are over 50 with hair past your shoulders. Unless it is to hide your ear hair, then it is ok. But stop winking at me, Shaggy.
4) Don't post a picture of Mr Happy, one Mr. Cowboy of Benton, AR. Now you are banned from the site and will never meet Miss Right! On the bright side, I showed your Lil Cowboy to my lesbian daughter and got to say in my best pre-k teacher voice, "that's a penis". *
More later... I feel I must continue my quest if only for the sake of you, my dear fans.
*The lesbian daughter's response..."It looked weird!"
Yes, my family is crazy but we have much more fun that way. Sister and I have long planned to end our days like the Baldwin Sisters on the Waltons--living together and drinking lots of the recipe! *cackle*
(Anyone who can explain that reference will be entered in a drawing for a choice of ebook download.)
7 comments:
The Baldwin sisters prepared "Papa's Recipe" aka "the recipe" for moonshine, but did not realize it was alcoholic in nature.
Good night, Shayla. ;0
I always wondered if the Baldwin sisters knew but didn't want to admit it. Like those little old ladies who play bingo but would never dare gamble. *Sigh* I miss the Waltons. I had a crush on Jason. I think it was the ears.
BTW, Shayla, your family is perfect.
Your family is hilarious. What a great cast of characters! Love it!
The Baldwin sisters made "the recipe" just because their dad made it before them but had no idea what it was (or pretended not to know). Moonshine, of course! Goodnight, John Boy!
It's definitely papa's moonshine recipe and don't worry i have a crazy family too the recipe always helps LOL
Don't think we had the Waltons here in Germany, so I'm not gonna comment on the moonshine recipe ;-)
I love your family, they are hilarious, always have a great laugh when reading their status or comments on FB. Thank you and sis on the tips on online dating, still not successful either so maybe I can learn a couple of things of what not to do ;-)
Have a wonderful weekend!
Kathrin
Great post, Shayla. I always thought it was a hoot that the prim, polite and very ladylike Baldwin sisters, were always peddling Papa's Recipe.
Thank you, everyone, for stopping by! My weekend got out of control and yesterday was an extremely long day! I'm just now getting a chance to post the winner!
Random chosen winner... Sara Bell! Pick an ebook from my bookshelf and let me know which one at shayla AT shaylakersten DOT com!
Hope ya'll have a fabulous week! Stay cool!
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